EP. 30- Being a Perfectionist will KEEP YOU STUCK


EP. 30- Being a Perfectionist will KEEP YOU STUCK

Today, I am sharing a little piece from my book, How To Lose Your Last 10 Pounds: Simple, Permanent, Deprivation-Free.

The book is structured in 4 parts. The reason it’s structured that way is that most women read weight loss book after weight loss book. We become collectors of weight loss information and do not take action. The way the book is set up is about coaching you through taking action.

The first part is the 7 main chapters that are meant to be read one per day, so by the 7th day, you have everything you need to take action. Then there are 7 bonus chapters, which you can read while you are already taking action. However, they’re not to be read unless you are fully committed and fully taking action.

The third section, after the bonus chapters, is a Q & A section. The section that I’m sharing today is the last Q & A of the book that was inspired by a text from my little sister.

The fourth part of my book is the workbook. You can not only go through the 7 chapters that contain all the information you need to get to your goal, plus the 7 bonus chapters and the Q & A section, but you get a workbook as well!


Q: Brenda, do you ever have off days? And if you do, do you ever feel guilty or bad for having off days? Do you ever get frustrated, sad, emotional with yourself because you think you should be strong and badass all the time?

A: Fuck yes, I have off days! And hell yes, I get frustrated! I feel sad and emotional, impatient, you name it! I am a human and so are you. Here’s a great question for you, and one that I sometimes need to remind myself if I’m feeling this way:

Who says you should be strong and badass all the time?

That thought, that expectation, that you need to be perfect, strong, badass all the time, is a recipe for disaster. These tools and strategies that I have shared with you in this book are here for you to utilize to do precisely that. Empower yourself when necessary. They are there to help you understand why things are happening and how to change them.

What these tools are not for is to expect yourself to be perfect or to expect yourself to always feel like a million bucks every minute of every day. You are still human. Life is imperfect. I like to think of this as actually a beautiful and amazing thing.

Perfection and Guilt

Setting perfection for yourself as a standard is not only a whole lot of pressure, but it’s also literally impossible. Life will never be perfect. No human on earth will ever be perfect.

I used to struggle with perfection, and one day I decided this: I would rather be courageous and human, than perfect.

There will be days when you’ll feel emo (a.k.a. emotional). There will be days when you’re tired, sad, frustrated.

On those days, know that these tools and strategies are here to help you, to empower you to choose something different.

But, they are sure as hell not here for you to beat yourself up over not using them 100% of the time perfectly every single minute of every day.

Again: human. I’m human, you are human.

Even with these badass tools? Yep, still human.

Yes, you can create anything you want in your life, 100%, no doubt. But still, human.

On these kinds of days, always remember love, compassion, understanding, patience. These are the best things you can give yourself.

You are strong. You are limitless. You can literally create anything.

But you don’t have to be superhuman and perfect.

Perfect is not necessary at all.

In fact, just like with guilt, it does not serve you at all. It hinders you. You get to create amazing things in your life and you get to do it all as a messy, imperfect and absolutely capable and loveable human!


If you want to get a special edition hard-cover copy of the book, there are two ways to do that. First, leave a review for the podcast and take a screenshot. Second, tell a friend about the podcast and take a screenshot of that as well. Send those screenshots to Brenda@brendalomelli.com and each month I’ll draw the raffle and announce the winner.

Resources mentioned:

The book: How To Lose Your Last 10 Pounds

Check out the Beauty Coach Podcast