EP. 20- You gotta really want it.


EP. 20- You gotta really want it.

This question came in from a listener recently:

Why lose the weight at all if you’re kind of happy with where you’re at?

The last 10 pounds is where a lot of women are. It’s where they’re stuck at. They say it would be nice to lose the last 10 pounds, but they’re kind of happy where they are.

I never tell anyone they should lose the last 10 pounds. It’s something you have to want. Then if you want it, I will help you make it happen, teach you the tools and strategies. But I can’t give you the wanting of it.

If you are happy with where you’re at, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. If you want to do lose the weight, you have to commit at a higher level.

Be honest with yourself, do you really want it or are you happy with where you’re at? There’s no right or wrong.

Do you really want it?

Losing the last 10 pounds is like having kids or wanting to be a doctor. Becoming a physician is not an easy thing to do at all. It requires a lot of hard work. It is a lot of effort and energy and time. It’s essential that you really, really want it so you’re willing to achieve that goal. Likewise, having kids is not easy, but if it’s something you want to experience then it’s totally worth it.

These things are not for the faint of heart. They require time, energy, hard work, sacrifices, prioritizing things and making choices.

The last 10 pounds is, for the most part, the most challenging weight to lose.

When it comes to things that are not easy to achieve, it’s important that you want it. You have got to really want it.

Give yourself the gift of the decision

If you are kind of happy, but you kind of what to the last 10 pounds, give yourself the gift of making the decision either way. If you stay in a place where you want to lose the last 10 pounds but you’re happy where you are, you don’t really do either. You don’t let yourself be fully happy where you’re at. You’re in no man’s land, living in Limbo.

If the idea of losing these last 10 pounds sounds nice, but you don’t want it that much and you’re not ready to commit or put in that amount of work or effort, that’s okay. Stop telling yourself you have to or should lose the last 10 pounds because the truth is that you don’t. Let yourself just truly be happy.

If you want it—if you really, really want it, and you know it won’t be easy but you want it—then give yourself the gift of going all in and committing and doing it. If you want it, you’re up for the challenge of doing what needs to be done in order to have that experience in your life.

The decision is up to you, but make the decision. Then you give yourself the gift of the decision. If you really want it, then go all in and go out and get it.

Find your why

Once you decide that you do want this, not because you should or have to or need to, but because you really want to, find your why.

One way in order to generate the feelings of ongoing commitment is to be aware of why you want it. That’s not something I or another coach can tell you either, but something you have to find for yourself.

Getting clear on why you want it will help you to be up for the challenge, up for the effort that it takes to get to the outcome. Get really clear on your reasons why you want this.

It doesn’t matter if those reasons are good enough for other people, as long as they make you feel motivated, determined, inspired, committed, focused, and driven to go get that.


Get a blank piece of paper and write down numbers 1 through 10.

If you decided this is something you really want, write down your top 10 reasons why you really want this.

When you’re feeling not motivated, check in to your list. Remind yourself of it every day until you get to your goal.

But remember, if you don’t really want it, that’s absolutely fine. Don’t “should” yourself into it.

Make the decision. You either want it or you don’t.

And if you do, go get it!